Kim Jong Un Got Nutin On Mah Coral Blue

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demon: i possessed you
me: get the fuck out
demon: damn...aight...rude ass bitch...i just need a place to stay my girl kicked me out and i aint got no money...
me: shit man, you can stay but don't be spinning my head like an owl and shit

(Source: miarps, via greetings)

moriarty:

when someone on your dash is nightblogging and its still daytime where you live

whisperinqs:

when the quiet kid in class makes a good comeback

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(Source: tortillah, via pandabearjayy)

Mom: son, eat your greens so you can grow up big and strong
Me: na fam I can smoke green and still flex
Mom: raw

snorlaxatives:

waking up and realizing you still have more time to sleep

image

(via trust)

colossal-sweat:

walking out of a bathroom with no hand dryers like

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(via stop)